SteveSilver.net

Quote of the Day

Jeffrey Goldberg on how he sees the Israel/Gaza situation:

I have friends in Gaza about whom I worry a great deal; I've seen many people killed in Gaza; I've served in the Israeli Army in Gaza; I've been kidnapped in Gaza; I've reported for years from Gaza; I hope my former army doesn't kill the wrong people in Gaza; I hope Israeli soldiers all leave Gaza alive; I know they'll be back in Gaza; I think this operation will work; and I have no actual hope that it will work for very long, because nothing works for very long in the Middle East. Gaza is where dreams of reconciliation go to die. Gaza is where the dream of Palestinian statehood goes to die; Gaza is where the Zionist dream might yet die. Or, more to the point, might be murdered. I'm not a J Street moral-equivalence sort of guy. Yes, Israel makes constant mistakes, which I note rather frequently, but this conflict reminds me once again that Israel is up against an implacable force, namely, an interpretation of Islam that disallows the idea of Jewish national equality.

My paralysis isn't an analytical paralysis. It's the paralysis that comes from thinking that maybe there's no way out. Not out of Gaza, out of the whole thing.

Anti-Obit of the Year

Tom Powers on Carl Pohlad. Ouch.

No Dog, No Cry

Apparently I wasn't the only one who spent years thinking that "Marley and Me" was not the heartwarming tale of a writer and his dog, but rather a biography of Bob Marley. Entertainment Weekly this week ran a sidebar of "other movies that sound like "Bob Marley biopics: "Legend," "Exodus," "What About Bob," and "Buffalo Soldiers."

Sucks to Be Norm

Nate Silver:

In his career running for statewide office, Coleman has lost to a professional wrestler, beaten a dead guy, and then tied a comedian.

Carl Pohlad, RIP

The longtime Twins owner Carl Pohlad died today at the age of 93.

Pohlad's legacy as an owner is the definition of "mixed." Yes, he saved the team from being sold and possibly moved to Tampa in 1984, and he of course presided over the team's two championships in '87 and '91.

But then there was the years of threatening to move the team, the cheapness, the consistently low payroll, and the attempted contraction in 2001. Pohlad is the owner I like to point at when people, usually in Philly, complain about how cheap their $100 million-payroll team is.

I believe Pohlad's son, Jim, will run the team now.

"He Fathered a Football Team- An Orchestra If You Count the Bastards"

FanIQ has updated its list of which athletes have the most illegitimate children.

More on the Top Ten

I elaborate on the year's best movies in the Trend.

Bye Bye, Bat

News Item: Pat Burrell signs with Rays

Pat Burrell today signed with Tampa Bay for two years and $16 million, which actually represents a pay cut for the slugger, who made $13 million last year.

Pat, as most star Philly athletes do, had a checkered record in town, having a couple of great years, as well as a couple of bad ones, but his tenure ended as well as it possibly could have, with a ring.

Burrell also, I believe, was near the top of the getting-laid-the-most-by-a-Philly-athlete leader board, though I have no way of documenting that as a journalist, and he almost certainly ranks below Wilt Chamberlain.

Quote of the Day

Mark Craig of the Strib, after Sunday:

Eagles fans who don't appreciate Donovan McNabb should be sentenced to spend eternal damnation with a 25-year-old Tarvaris Jackson as their quarterback.

Either that or be forced to watch a continuous loop of Philadelphia's 26-14 victory over the Vikings in Sunday's NFC first-round playoff game at the Metrodome.

The Worst of BillO

Cracked has some fun:

Senator Franken

News Item: Franken declared winner of Senate race

I didn't want him to run, or get the Democratic nomination, but now that he's in there, it should be fascinating.

Well, At Least It Wasn't Blocked Out

A tense day in the Silver household is over, as the Vikings lost to the Eagles today in the NFC playoffs. Not a huge surprise, but a disappointment nonetheless. A few thoughts-

- The loss was like a microcosm of all the Vikings' problems all year- weak quarterback play, bad playcalling, misuse of Adrian Peterson, stupid turnovers. I know they went 10-6 and won the division and everything, but changes need to be made.

- Even though everyone in town hates him, it doesn't look like there's any chance Brad Childress will be fired. I'd wait for a year from now, when five different Super Bowl-winning coaches will be on the market.

- No, Andy Reid won't be fired, either. Sorry, Angelo. Though nice to see him and Childress hug after the game, I guess they don't hate each other like Belichick and Mangini do.

- The Tarvaris Jackson experiment really needs to end, this team isn't going anywhere with him. I'd be for bringing in a veteran, one better than Gus Frerotte, although it's looking like Donovan McNabb probably won't be available.

- Speaking of Donovan, he won the big game. Again. He didn't come up small. Remember that next time someone says he "always chokes in big games."

- What the hell was that "rap" that played over the Fox music at the beginning? It made the mediocre NBC Faith Hill song sound like "Stairway to Heaven."

- After all the talk of the Vikings having trouble selling out and Eagles fans "taking over" the stadium, I didn't get the idea that there was much of an Eagles fan presence, at least going by crowd noise.

- Eagles play the Giants next weekend at 1 p.m. It seems like they've already played four games this year (really only two), but the Eagles won in New York a few weeks ago and I can see them doing it again. I'll be in Vegas for CES but maybe I'll sneak into a sports book and watch it that morning.

The Movie The Car Alarm Industry Doesn't Want You To See

Looking for a movie to rent or Netflix? Don't choose "Noise," a pretty absurd comedy-drama starring Tim Robbins that I watched the other night.

Robbins stars as an Upper West Side yuppie, married to Bridget "Tom Brady's baby momma" Moynihan, who really, really, hates car alarms. Rather than just get over it, or buy an iPod, like most people, he decides to go outside, break into the cars, and cut the power to the alarms. First he does it and gets arrested three times, and then he starts doing it anonymously, calling himself "The Rectifier," leaving stickers on the cars, and becoming a city folk hero.

The plot, let's say, has quite a few holes in it. First, most people who live in New York either stop noticing the noise after while or, if it really bothers them, move to the suburbs or another city. Robbins, for some reason, stays.

But even worse is this- once this anonymous "Rectifier" appears, wouldn't it maybe occur to the police that perhaps it might be the guy who's been arrested on three separate occasions for exactly the same thing, and later tried to sue to ban car alarms? And it appears that every car he cuts off is on his street- doesn't that sort of give away that it's someone who lives nearby?

Then again, it sounds an awful lot like Robbins was playing himself.

Film Critic Quote of the Week

ALOTT5MA's Adam Bonin, on "Frost/Nixon":

To try to put yourself in the environment of Frost/Nixon, imagine it's 2010 and George W. Bush has decided to sit for his first post-Presidency interview as a twenty-plus hours exclusive taping with ... Carson Daly, or somewhere halfway between Ryan Seacrest and that guy who does the sex predator busts for Dateline.

Final Thoughts on Purple vs. Green

Jim Souhan has an uncharacteristically great column about how Donovan McNabb is the thread that connects everything in Sunday's game. More importantly, there's pretty much no scenario Sunday that could possibly lead to Donovan ending up with the Vikings next year.

Meanwhile, Steve Aschburner has recognized that fans of the Vikings and Eagles are very, very different. This column would greatly anger everyone in Philly if they had ever heard of MinnPost.com.

Bill Simmons, KSK and Deadspin, meanwhile, have devoted their coverage of the game to the "two horrible coaches square off" subplot.

How will it end up? It depends on which Eagles team shows up, and which Vikings team. My gut feeling? Eagles 21, Vikings 16.

As for the overall playoffs, I see a Manning-Manning Super Bowl, and the most insufferable two-week lead-in imaginable.

All Nude, Tastefully Done, Together Again!

News Item: Marbury may reunite with Garnett on Celtics

Yet another reason for Wolves fans to feel miserable...

He's a Bad Ukulele (Shut Yo Mouth!)

The Ukulele Orchestra of Great Britain. "Theme From Shaft." Go:

I once heard a tuba player cover the same song at a St. Paul Saints game, but this was even better.

Best DUI Excuse Ever

News Item: Barkley claims he was "in a hurry to receive oral sex" when stopped

It's long been alleged that Charles Barkley can get away with saying and doing absolutely anything; this is the latest and greatest test of that hypothesis.

Chutzpah Award Nominee

News Item: Wilf pushes new Vikings stadium as "economic stimulus"

Really? This week? When a playoff game isn't sold out yet? Really, Zygi?

Happy New Year

Have a good last night of 2008. I never got around to the achievement awards or Shameful Events list last year, but I hope to get that up by the weekend.

Top Ten Films of 2008 (mine)

1. "The Dark Knight"
2. "Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist"
3. "Milk"
4. "Rachel Getting Married"
5. "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button"
6. "Frost/Nixon"
7. "The Visitor"
8. "Man on Wire"
9. "Wall-E"
10. "Dear Zachary"

Honorable Mention: "Valkyrie," "In Bruges," "Forgetting Sarah Marshall," "The Pineapple Express," "Burn After Reading," "Be Kind Rewind," "The Bank Job," "Iron Man," "The Wackness," "Synecdoche, New York," "Young@Heart," "Definitely, Maybe"

Top Ten TV Shows of 2008 (mine)

1. "The Shield" (FX)
2. "Mad Men" (AMC)
3. "The Wire" (HBO)
4 (tie). "The Daily Show"/"The Colbert Report" (Comedy Central)
6. "How I Met Your Mother" (CBS)
7. "The Paper" (MTV)
8. "Saturday Night Live" (NBC)
9. "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia" (FX)
10. "Morning Joe" (MSNBC)

Top Five Albums of 2008 (mine)

1. Vampire Weekend, "Vampire Weekend"
2. Coldplay, "Viva La Vida, Or Death and All His Friends"
3. The Hold Steady, "Stay Positive"
4. Soundtrack, "Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist"
5. Lil Wayne, "Tha Carter III"

Top 40 Products of 2008 (my magazine's)

E-Gear gives us the top 40 gadgets of the year.

Crime Time

The last consumer electronics retail crime roundup of the year is online at Dealerscope.com

Good to Know

The other day, Brandeis University's newspaper, the Justice (both my alma maters)sent out an e-mail blast re-assuring us all that Brandeis' endowment is safe, despite the havoc wreaked on Jewish philanthropy worldwide by Bernie Madoff.

Apparently the Shapiro family- which has its name on the student center, the admissions center, a large freshman dorm, and probably a dozen other buildings on campus- lost a large part of their fortune in the fraud. The university itself, though, had no money tied up with Madoff. Which means that they're much better run than the New York Mets.

First the Movie Theater Thing, Now This

News Item: Eagles-Cowboys dispute leads to shooting.

Not sure which one was the shooter, but the guy who was arguing for the Eagles? He was right.

Blago, Burress and the "Cracker Ass Cracker" Vote

Ta-Nehesi makes a whole lot of sense.

The Wild Thing Goes National

News Item: Mitch Williams hired as analyst by MLB Network

A Comcast Sports Net and WIP host for the past two years, the "Wild Thing" had previously been known primarily as that huge-mulletted relief pitcher who gave up the World Series-losing home run in 1993. But then a surprising thing happened- he turned out to be a great, great broadcaster. He'll be missed in Philly- I'll never forget his outraged commentary the night Game 5 of the World Series was suspended ("There was standing water on the field!"), and a knowledgable and authoritative sports media figure in a town with way too few.

Something sort of eerie, though- Williams was originally hired on both WIP and Comcast to replace John Marzano, who was leaving to work for MLB.com and eventually the MLB Network. Marzano died of a heart attack this year, and now Williams is succeeding him in another job.

Rabbi Arnold Jacob Wolf, RIP

I was sorry to hear earlier this week that the legendary Chicago rabbi Arnold Jacob Wolf had passed away at the age of 84. I studied with Rabbi Wolf for two weeks at camp in 1995 or so, and I was shocked to hear him emerge more than a decade later as a friend, neighbor and defender of Barack Obama. I had had no idea of his earlier fame as an anti-war and civil rights activist.

Onion Headline of the Decade Nominee

From 2001: 300 Naked Women Feared Lost In Computer Crash

From the People Who Brought You "Santorum..."

Name a sex act after Saddleback!

What's Wrong With You, Minny?

News Item: 14,000 tickets still available for Vikings-Eagles game at Metrodome

This is kind of embarrassing- I thought we had good fans! Especially for the first home playoff game in eight years.

Why is this happening? I've heard a few theories: The majority of regular season games are attended by season ticket holders; not a lot of people buy single-game and are having trouble getting into the habit now. The Metrodome's not an especially fun venue, and you can't see a thing from the upper deck. Despite the 10-6 record and division title, there's dissatisfaction with the team, and no one really trusts Childress or T-Jack.

There's also the economy- Minnesota's richest citizens got hit big-time by the Madoff ponzi scheme, coming right on the heels of the much smaller and local but similar Petters ponzi scheme- I'm sure some of the many season ticket holders not buying playoff tickets were part of one of those groups.

Maybe it's just the dirty little secret that in most situations, NFL games are a lot more fun to watch on TV than they are to attend in person.

At any rate, I doubt there will actually be a blackout- sponsors tend to step up to buy tickets in this type of situation. But what I do expect is that many, many Philadelphia fans will show up in Minny for the game, and it'll be a big story in the days afterward.

Film Critic Quote of the Week

Sean Burns of Philadelphia Weekly, on "Revolutionary Road":

Did you ever hear the one about how beneath those postcard-perfect shiny surfaces, the suburbs are actually barren wastelands of dysfunction? Oh, yeah—everybody’s heard that one...

But here we go again anyway, and what separates Revolutionary Road from those other flicks is its complete absence of humor, characterization or story. Kate and Leo just stand around shouting the subtext at one another...

Revolutionary Road might work best as a sick joke, aimed at couples who went to see Titanic on a first date and now find themselves married and as miserable as Frank and April Wheeler. Otherwise, I can’t imagine any reason for it to exist.

At the screening tonight, I'm convinced that 50 percent of the people who showed up only came because they heard Kate Winslet has a new movie that's filled with nude scenes, only they confused 'Road' with "The Reader."

One highlight though- during what's meant to be the film's most emotionally wrenching moment, a woman's cell phone rang. Except it didn't just ring- her particular ring consisted of a Cookie Monster-like voice yelling "Ring ring," several times in rapid succession, followed by a loud scream.

Normally, I don't have much of a tolerance for that sort of thing. But this particular ring, at that particular moment of that particular movie- I couldn't stop laughing for the rest of the movie and for about 10 minutes afterward.

Chutzpah Award Winner

News Item: Rod Blagojevich names Roland Burris to fill Obama's seat

The Minnesota nightmare is bad enough, and so is Caroline Kennedy- but now we've got the state and national Democrats both standing in the way of a probably illegal appointment. Sending Bobby Rush out there to brandish the race card and throw the word "lynching" around was a nice touch too.

I just hope Blago is impeached before Burris can be seated.

Peyton Manning is Larry David

Jason Whitlock goes crazy with the NFL/HBO analogies, first going Eagles/Sopranos:

Andy Reid and Donovan McNabb are the Tony Soprano and Paulie Walnuts of the NFL. Yes, they bicker and fight and have good reason to be suspicious of each other, but at the end of the day, you'll always find Andy Soprano and Donnie Walnuts in the same foxhole.

Reid and McNabb drive me crazy. If Reid would just give McNabb his own crew, the Eagles would earn with the best of them. And if McNabb would avoid the boneheaded mistake, Reid would have more incentive to make him the captain of a talented offensive crew.

It's frustrating. It's also inspiring the way these two never abandon each other. They've been through the good times and the bad times. Who will ever forget when they had to whack Terrell "Big Pussy" Owens for turning rat?

Ray Ray and Ed Reed are the real Avon Barksdale and Wee-Bey Brice of Baltimore, old-school, ride-or-die soldiers. Joe "Stringer Bell" Flacco and John "Marlo Stanfield" Harbaugh are likely to receive a lot of hype for the Ravens' surprising season, but Ray Ray and Ed Reed held it down on the streets.

Donovan Redeemed

Stephen A. Smith- who can be a hell of a good writer when he actually tries hard- has a great piece on ESPN.com on Donovan McNabb's late-season redemption. And yes, I'm resigned to the fact that McNabb-to-the-Vikings isn't happening, at least not this year, and regardless of what happens Sunday Donovan and T-Jack will remain quarterbacks of their respective teams in 2009.

"Like Johnny Carson Being Replaced by Dane Cook"

Apparently, everyone really hates film critic Ben Lyons. Not hard to blame them, if you ask me.

By All Means, Go Ahead and Do It, GOP

From a Politico story on this ridiculous "Magic Negro" flap:

The controversy surrounding a comedy CD distributed by Republican National Committee chair candidate Chip Saltsman has not torpedoed his bid and might have inadvertently helped it.

Four days after news broke that the former Tennessee GOP chairman had sent a CD that included a song titled “Barack the Magic Negro” to the RNC members he is courting, some of those officials are rallying around the embattled Saltsman, with a few questioning whether the national media and his opponents are piling on.

I know, I know, it's a backlash against "political correctness." But someone showing up in Congress in a Klan hood would be politically incorrect too- and also very, very wrong.

Sure to Be Wrong

I make 15 predictions for the year to come in this week's North Star column.